Missing the Pieces of My Head.

Insanity, Insanity. It seems to be running rampant nowadays. Oh gleeful yet stress-inducing insanity. I wonder how long I can take you on? I’ve taken this job already thinking that I must have known what I was doing, yet I’ve come to realize that you manage to dumbfound even some of the most prepared adversaries. What shall I do with you? Which manner should be appropriate for handling such a formidable opponent? Oh, Insanity. You really should take a vacation. Perhaps then I shall be able to conjure up a better plan to challenge you effectively.

Yes, that was my very small ode to Insanity. It’s a little short to be an ode, but oh well. Insanity speaks for itself. Lately I have been feeling as though I am surrounded by nothing but pure insanity. It doesn’t make much sense to me anymore. My life has turned into this very unsatisfying and weird piece of cryptic mumbo jumbo that has only really proven to be a living oxymoron. My room itself is a living oxymoron, as it is truly an organized mess. One can scarcely make heads or tails of it! I miss the peace and quiet. It was rather nice. Soon I will be acquainted with the long-missed peace and quiet once again. That in itself will be wonderful.

There isn’t really much to say today.  I took the book back to BAM and got my money back. I really didn’t have a need for it anyway. But other than that, this has been an (abnormally!) normal day.

-Alya Songstress

Mr. Pibb, Mr. Pibb, Mr. Pibb, Pepsi.

While reflecting on the past few days’ events, I have come to realize a few things:


1.) People will be how they have known themselves to be. There is no way to change them unless they have the willpower, capability, and proper resources to be able to change.


2.) Trying to change a person after accepting said person is nothing but a pointless endeavor. There is no acceptable reason to contemplate a reason to, attempt to, become frustrated with trying to, or ultimately give up trying to change a person. They will change if they want to. Save your time, money, and energy. You will need it, especially in this economy.


3.) Trying to change someone proves even more fruitless if the person in question is someone that you were not able to choose, but were rather born under their supervision or company. If they are, in fact, a parent or relative, then any attempt to change them is generally also taken as an act of disrespect.


4.) Chances are that after reading my first three points, one would be confused by the time he/she would reach this point. In a nutshell, the above three points say this: There is no way to change someone unless they want to change. You have no one to blame but yourself if you try to change someone and then become frustrated at your inevitable failure. Finally, trying to change someone is even more pointless if the person in question is someone in the family or someone in authority.


5.) I’m done.


Unforgivably rude people. I’ve had my share of them. In fact, I feel as though I’m living with them. But today was not a good day to say the least. I feel as though I’m invisible to everyone around me and even when people notice me, I’m always being snubbed. It’s not a wonderful feeling.


I took a trip to my local Books-A-Million to find one classical book and nothing more. I looked around very peacefully, found my book, then stood in line peacefully and waited behind two ladies that had been standing in front of me. The man at the counter was very nice to them, serving them nice compliments and handling their purchases very carefully. But when he got to me, he had nowhere near the same courtesy, to say the least. He didn’t even ask for my discount card, he barely even said hello to me, and wouldn’t even put my book in a bag. I had to ask for a bag.


Now really. I know it seems very trivial for me to get upset over something like that but it bothered me. I was very insulted that he was so nice to the ladies in front of me but he snubbed me. And really, he had no reason for it. It made me very upset and it’s been bothering me all day. I think I will just take this book back. I would rather spend the extra gasoline and go somewhere with better customer service. Or maybe this was just a sign that I really didn’t need a new book at all.

Sigh.

-Alya Songstress